Merry Thankmus!!

This past weekend, Nantie and Uncle Elvis had us all up to their place for a holiday party.  Unable to get everyone together for Thanksgiving and Christmas, the shin ding was dubbed, "Merry Thankmus" ...

It was a hoot.

Little Buddy got to cheat at musical chairs...

We got our do-si-do on...

Little Buddy got to drool over his best Wyoming girl...

SweetPea and I took some pictures... and Tweeted, updated our Facebook status, texted..

And did I mention we watched the Broncos beat the Vikings in OT?

Oh yeah!

Thank you Nantie and Uncie Elvis for having us crazies up and treating us to such a lovely afternoon!  Yet another reminder of how blessed I am to have such an awesome family!

Ho Ho Ho!

Calling All My Prayer Warriors ~ Friend In Need!

Many of you already know SocialWrkr24/7's popular blog Eyes Opened Wider, journaling her life as a social worker.  She has a heart for God and the children on her caseload.  I wish we had more workers like her in our county.  No joke.  To many, she is the voice for the children, to me she is a wonderful friend and supporter..

It's time to return the favor.

The Sunday before Thankgiving, she went in to the ER with stomach pains.  Diagnosis?  Cancer.  Life flipped upside down in an instant... sadly a feeling many of us can relate to.  I asked her what we all could do.  She said, "Please pray" ... I've vowed to pray her through this and I hope you do, as well.

Please visit her blog, leave comments and, most importantly, pray.  I know how much the support our awesome community has meant to me (and continues to do so).  Let's lift up our wonderful friend and walk beside her.

Kiddo, you know how much I love you.  You are in my daily thoughts and prayers.  Hang in there .. and never forget, we're here for you!

My Birth Mom Search Continues.. Err, Kind Of..

Back in early 2010 I hired an investigator in an attempt to locate my Birth Mom. I tried searching for her myself on and off throughout the years (and with assistance of search angels.. ie: friends that worked for free) with no luck.

I was confident it would take but a few months for the professionals to track her down.  Heck, they're the company (the television show) Troy The Locator uses and they reunite people in, like, 22 minutes.  My case should be a piece of cake, right?

Um, no.

We hit a wall quickly (I have a very common birth name) and needed to have the county of my birth pull my non id info again.  There were several questions that weren't addressed when they originally sent it to me five years ago.  I was told a case worker would be assigned soon and advised to follow up in a few weeks to make sure I didn't fall through the cracks.  It should take 60-90 days to get the info back.  I called diligently every three months and was told the same thing..

For the next year and a half.. 

Yesterday I heard back from the worker.  When I picked myself up off the floor realized the questions (she could answer) were complete, I literally started to shake.   Then she asked if I preferred she mail it to me or shoot me an email.  What?  Duh..

I got the email today.

Unfortunately, not all the questions were answered and the ones that were are vague at best.  It's feeling like this search has run it's course.  That all being said, it's not the end of the world and I am far from incomplete.  I am grateful for my wonderful family and insanely fantastic group of friends.

She's out there somewhere, or maybe not. She wonders about me or she doesn't. I may never know.  Or maybe I will..  The one thing I do know?

No matter what, I'm very blessed.

Giving Thanks...

Thanksgiving is one of my favorite holidays but this was a weekend I had been dreading.  Unsure of which way it would go (would I end up locking myself in my closet with a bottle glass of wine rocking on the floor the entire time?), I braced myself for the worst version of me to seep through.

I'm happy to report composure was maintained and the entire family did really well.  We had some new friends join us and hootin' and a hollerin' wafted through the house.  Had it not been for the massive caloric intake, I would of had abs of steel from all the laughter.

Yes, Thursday has come and gone.  Leftovers are but a memory and pants are snug in all the wrong places.  Well mine are, anyway.  The bombardment of the holiday season in full swing but I will continue to be thankful.

I give thanks for my beautiful, crazy children, an amazing family, old and new friends, our home, laughing again (so hard it hurts), my job and awesome bosses.. and for somehow keeping my nose above water level.  Even when it's hard to see them, there are loads of blessings, big and small..

Everywhere.

A Year Ago Today...

At 9:00 pm, Matt and I were sitting on the couch watching TV.  It had been 6 months since our previous placement ("JuneBug") had left to live with her relatives out of state.  Nantie had also moved to Cheyenne and was living with her dreamboat, Elvis (who is STILL her rock star, might I add, and we love him dearly).  The house was quiet (well, except for the herd of canines..), errr, let's say not as lively as it had once been.  I was getting antsy, ready for SOMETHING to happen and honestly contemplating moving to a different county when recertification came up.

Then the phone rang.

An emergency placement.. a 6 year old boy and his 22 month old sister.  We asked the few important questions and agreed without giving it too much thought.  Kids in need, we had the room, why not?  It's what we were there for and it really wasn't a big deal.  Years prior we had put ourselves on the holiday list and figured it was a temporary thing.  Thanksgiving was a few days away, families tended to implode (drinking/drug use skyrockets) and available homes were scarce as many foster care providers went on holiday.  Basically, intakes spike. 

A week, two tops.

At 1:30am the following morning, headlights swooped across the driveway and a car parked out front.  It was a bitterly cold, clear night and the stars were twinkling.  Snuggled in sound asleep in the backseat the bright moonlight revealed two of the most beautiful sleeping faces I had ever seen.

And so it began...

This journey started with little fanfare and no expectation.  Two innocent angels caught up in a horrible mess. It feels like a decade ago and the blink of an eye all at the same time. So much has happened since.  Great breakthroughs and huge heartbreaks.  I am so grateful they are still here and pray we get this case wrapped up sooner rather than later.

One thing is certain, God has a curious way of going about things...

Fall Back.. Literally..

With the holiday season looming, I've been contemplating running away until after the New Year.  Some island with sugar sand and umbrella drinks.  Okay, maybe not but (had it not been for my kiddos) I probably would have given it serious thought.  Errr, maybe.  Don't fret.. we'll survive.. we've made it this far, right?

Right.

The crazy thing about this whole grief thing is how it sneaks up on you when you least expect it.  I was worried about Halloween.. missing Matt not seeing the kids' costumes, etc.  I breezed through it, no problemo.  All the events we went to were really fun and we had a blast.  Then, I started stressing about Thanksgiving.  That's going to be a huge challenge.. but guess what got me?  The TIME CHANGE. 

Seriously.

Matt's job was to change all the time on clocks.  The ones up high, down low and everything in between.  This past weekend really threw me for a loop.. totally unexpected.  Saturday, Sunday and most of Monday was a complete blue funk.  It sucked out loud, might I add.  But it, too, has passed.

Thank God...

My Shining Star...

Finding Me & Our New Normal

So, here we are. A few months down the road from the day our entire world got flipped upside down and turned inside out. So much has happened and I've got so much to say. That being said I, personally, cannot stand long, novelette blog posts so I'll fill y'all in with short and sweet ones.  Emphasis on try.  I'm getting my groove back and will do a better job at writing regularly.

Swears.

LittleBuddy and SweetPea are doing well.  He has his moments but they are fewer and farther between.  With SP, I'm seeing we dodged the Terrible Twos bullet but it's the Threes we need to wary of.  Oh my, the girl is sassy (that's the family friendly version).  Luckily, for both, they're so stinkin' cute ...

I am holding my own.  I purchased a treadmill a few weeks back to get my routine straightened out.  Seriously, I wasn't getting but 3 hours of sleep (the ole mind spin) and these early morning workouts now have me yawning by 9pm.  The bootie trimmin' is an added bonus!  :)

I still have my private break downs but they, too, are farther between.  The snow storm yesterday was especially hard.  More things added to my list of having to do (that were Matt's "jobs").. I now have to figure out how to get the snow plow on the ATV to push snow, taking brooms and beating snow off trees, etc.. But harder still was that this is really "our" time of year.  We loved to snowmobile and he was in his element in the cold and white stuff. 

One more thing to get through without him.

I'm standing on the edge of the holidays and absolutely dreading the thought.  To be honest, if I didn't have the kids, I would find a way to disappear until after January and just not deal.  Or crawl into myself and not celebrate.  The reality is, that cannot happen and our entire family will pull off the smiles, excitement and bear it.  The kiddos will have their holidays like all the others. 

But oh my gosh, it's going to be hard.

The adoption is still delayed thanks to an appeal that will be denied.  Eventually.  When the judge gets to it.  Someday.  Sigh..

For today, I pray for strength and peace for our family to get through the next few months.  But mostly give thanks for all our blessings, including my silly, sweet, sassy kiddos. 

Without them, gosh only knows where my life would've gone..

Hello? Is This Thing On?!?

Sorry for the recent blog neglect.. just trying to find my way through this "new normal". Things here are actually going really well, all things considered. I've pulled way back on LittleBuddy's therapy sessions and he is returning to his sweet, silly self. Seriously, we know Daddy is gone... no need to reopen that wound every.single.week.  Gah!

In other news..
The Raffle:
From GSG Customs Facebook Fan Page:
We had an amazing turn out over 100 people in the shop and we had 181 people watching online! I would like to give thanks to ComposiMo Fabrication, Ice House Tavern for all the support!

James, Me and the Tonka Toy:

Now here are the winners :
Chris Johnson - won "Tonka Toy"
Philip Saraff - won a complete GY6 motor swap for his ruckus
Tim Nichols - GSG Hoodie
Deanne Fujiooto - GSG Hoodie
Nathan Mielnik - GSG Hoodie
Mark Holcomb - GSG Hoodie
Aaron Carlock - $25.00 gift card to The Ice House Tavern
Mellisa Moringlo - $25.00 gift card to The Ice House Tavern

Us in action that night:


One more time.. A HUGE, "THANK YOU!!!" to everyone that participated, donated, got the word out and to Lizzie.. who got me home safely. :)

It's Raffle Night, Y'all!!!

The big count down has begun for the Grand Reopening Party at Grape Street Garage Customs ... and we're raffling Tonka Toy off  TONIGHT!

THERE'S STILL TIME TO GET YOUR WINNING TICKET!!

100% of the proceeds are going to a fund for LittleBuddy and SweetPea.  They will ship the bike anywhere in the US (or deliver it personally if the winner is local!).  You need not be present to win.  There are 4 ways to purchase the tickets, please go to GSG Customs Shop Blog for deets! 

We'll be live streaming the event.. will post the link later on today so you can watch us in action!   I'll be drawing YOUR winning ticket tonight at 9:30 MDT/8:30 PST/11:30 EST.  I'll also be getting my geek on and tweeting from my own account @FullCircle_Mel & @GSGCustoms.. FOLLOW US for all the fun!

The Tonka Toy in action (THIS COULD BE YOU NEXT WEEKEND!):