Christmas Snapshots..

Beginning...

Middle...

End...

And today, we rest.

I hope everyone had a VERY Merry Christmas!

Where Tree Tops Glisten..

And children listen
to hear sleigh bells in the snow...

I'm Dreaming ...

Of A White Christmas...

And it's still snowing! WOOT!

Do You Know What I Know?

Even grief can't completely ruin Christmas.

There is nothing that melts me more than SweetPea (almost three) OOhhh-ing and Awww-ing over the lights and ornaments. When she asked, "Mommy, may I kiss Baby Desus, pwease?" (she loves the Nativity scenes) I thought my heart would explode with love for my little curly haired angel.

This all happening between temper tantrums, of course.

Christmas is alive and well in our home, thanks to the innocence, excitement and wonderment of both my children. A reminder of what the Season is truly all about...

Hope.

For unto us a child is born, unto us a son is given: and the government shall be upon his shoulder: and his name shall be called Wonderful, Counselor, The mighty God, The everlasting Father, The Prince of Peace.  Isaiah 9:6

A Christmas Letter ~ To My Husband

Dear Matt,

I would like to say this is a Christmas season full of joy but really, it's far from it.  You know this is my second favorite holiday (after Thanksgiving) and it has been brutal at best.  I finally got the inside of the house decorated (a half-assed job but I gave it my all) and friends, Uncle JoeJoe and Uncle Mike helped decorate the outside.  I didn't hang your stocking and every time I look at the fireplace I'm reminded of the void.

I'm tired, angry and sad...

The kids are doing pretty well.  LittleBuddy has struggled lately, getting in trouble at school and here at home.  Some things are typical 7 year old boy-issues, others not.  At times he exhausts me but that's nothing new.  I'm bound and determined to raise him up to be a good man.. God as my witness, it will happen.

SweetPea is amazing.. almost totally potty trained, completely sassy, talking up a storm, she sings, counts, dances.. She melted your heart months ago and would do it doubly now.  And oh boy, can she rock a temper fit.  But dammit, she's beautiful.

They both are.

I think the entire family's goal is to survive this season and get it far behind us.  New Years will be equally as tough, as we would snowmobile every year, but that too will pass.  I have huge hope 2012 will be better for all of us.

It has to be.

Until Next Time,

I Get By With A Little Help From My Friends..

And My Family...

:-)

The Most Wonderful Time Of The Year?

Not for everyone...

We've had a huge influx of family visiting since Thanksgiving and the distractions have been wonderful.  That being said, I still have had to lug out (and face) the Christmas decor and that has been no fun.  When I finally got the kids down for "quiet time" last Saturday, I was in the basement trying to maintain what's left of my dignity while digging through Christmas containers.  With my iPod jamming me to deafness, I was doing really well ... until I got to our stockings.  Then I fell apart... 

In a big way.

I had custom stockings made for Matt and I back in '02 and coming across them literally dropped me to my knees.  I could barely breathe my heart hurt so badly and I cried like a child.

It was August 12th all over again.

This grieving stuff completely sucks... however, it's a process I have no choice but to face.  If not now, when?  Once I regained composure and got on with the business of decking the halls it all wasn't nearly as crushing.  I'm not quite done yet but should have the house all purty-like by the weekend.  Normally I would be totally freaked out I'm so behind.  This year, not so much.

Please don't get me wrong, I love Christmas..

Just not this one.

MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!

From Our Little Home To Yours ~

May you have the spirit of Christmas
which is peace,
the gladness of Christmas
which is hope,
the heart of Christmas
which is love.

~Author Unknown

Wishing you all a very Merry Christmas!!

Hugs & Love,

A Christmas Note To Mama...

Dear Mama,

I wish I could send you a card, especially this year. You are always on my heart and now, with kiddos here at Christmas, you are missed even more. I didn't think that was possible ... but it is.

If a note could reach you I would tell you how special every child placed with us has been and that each would've stolen your heart. Especially our current little darlings. Lil Buddy is tender hearted and would've soaked your love up like a sponge. SweetPea looks just like me when I was little.. blue eyes, curly brown ringlets and all. Truth be told, she's way cuter but you were always rather prejudiced.. LOL.

The sweet memories you and Daddy created for me at Christmastime are flooding back in force. I don't know how you did it all. I wish you were here and we could reminisce. You hold the keys to my past and I feel they are slowly becoming lost forever. Our history is now but a few fading photos and a tape recording I found from my second Christmas. Yours and Daddy's voices transport me through time and space. A toddler repeating, "Oh no, not again!" and squealing over her new "atapilar" are all I have left.

But for that I am grateful.

My Christmas wish is that you know how much of an impact you made on my life. I will never be half the woman you were but will always strive to make you proud. Even though I was adopted, you loved me like I was a part of you... and I can still feel it.

Merry Christmas, Mama. I love you, too.

Pink Eye & Sniffles & Ear Aches ~ Oh My!

Little SweetPea welcomed the week with a gooey eye and trip to the doctor's office. Lo and behold, early stages of an ear infection were setting in, as well. She was also super boogery. Poor Boo! The bright side? Our little-un is on the mend and should be good as gold for the family gatherings Friday and Saturday.

The tricky part? Keeping the rest of us healthy so Christmas festivities can go on as planned.

On top of all my usual scrambling, I have a mountain of toys that need to be wrapped. From the looks of things (ie: my lack of time management skills this holiday season) I'll be in the basement until the wee hours of Christmas morning (undoubtedly cursing Scotch tape and losing the scissors). Fear not, my friends.. Frank, Nat and Bing will be crooning the classics and my trusty wine glass will be close at hand.

... And I'll be loving every minute of it!

Tradition...

Recently, I was reading Gesine's blog and she was talking about traditions. Not only is she an amazing baker (go check out her scrumptious Christmas creations) but she, too, lost her mother to cancer. Cooking is a way of connecting through time and space .. and that really spoke to me. This is the first time we've had kiddos over the holidays and I want to make it a very special season for them.. and not just with material things.. like Mama did for me.

Whether they are with us only a few more weeks or this is the beginning of our forever together, this year, the Christmas traditions begin.

Tradition #1: I was never a fan of those radio stations that played all Christmas music ALL the time (starting Thanksgiving Day). I thought it was totally overboard. Now, with the kiddos, that station is played continuously and Little Buddy and I happily sing along. Music was a very important part of my childhood and all the warm fuzzy memories are flooding back.

Thanks to my holiday bestie (Amazon), these are arriving soon ...






I hope Mama is smiling down, singing along with us.

The Season Of Wonder...

Little Buddy's Christmas Wish...

As I was preparing dinner last night (okay, that's a stretch.. Auntie MooMoo brought over homemade mmm mmm good chicken noodle soup and I was heating it up--are we spoiled or WHAT?!) Little Buddy came into the kitchen with a semi serious look-on. He gazed up at me with that cherub face of his and says,

"Mama, I really know what I want for Christmas this year.."

Bracing Myself

Moi: "What's that, darling?"
LB: "It's really important"
(Oh No)
Moi: "Okay"
LB: "A PUPPY!"

I literally laughed out loud.

For any of you that know us or have read this blog for a while, you know not only do we have dogs.. we have a herd of them.

Moi: "Seriously"
LB: "Ya"
Moi: "Go tell DH"

Into the living room we go...

LB: "Daddy"
DH: "What?"
LB: "I want a puppy for Christmas"

More laughter ensues..

DH: "Buddy, I don't think that's going to happen.."
LB: "But I want one of my own"
DH: "I see.. well, why don't you pick one of ours.. there are plenty to choose from"

Our sweet little man happily chose Coco.. his favorite. Although still quite spunky, she is our 16 year old min pin that is blind and going deaf. Bless his heart!

For the record, the only thing remotely close to puppies under our tree will be pictures printed on a gift card next to a Target logo:


(No subliminal messages here, honey..)

Survey Says...

Bronchitis

Unable to kick the goo that has plagued me for the last week and a half, I hit the doctor's office yesterday and took the rest of the day off. I'm Zpacking and feeling better today.

Well, I think I am so that's all that matters.

DH got home early yesterday and started putting Christmas lights up on the house. One of the workers picked the kids up from day care for a visit and brought them home afterwards (great timing for me.. I got to stay in my jammies and rest all afternoon). When they got home I could hear Little Buddy from the car yelling, "Lights!! Lights!!! Daddy put up lights!!"..

That alone made me feel better.

Perfect Moment Monday

On Sunday we had the family over for Christmas brunch. Nantie whipped up an amazing meal.. an egg/hash brown casserole, bacon, sausage, freshly cut pineapple, scrumptious mini fruit bowls, croissants, mimosas .. to die for. We chatted, laughed and later enjoyed a movie together.

Although my jeans no longer fit.. it was the perfect end to a wonderful holiday weekend!

I Capture
Perfect Moments.

T'was The Day After Christmas..

.. and the house is trashed..

I was going to take pictures and but a girl has to have some pride. Trust me, it's a wreck.

We enjoyed a lovely Christmas afternoon/evening at Auntie Moo and Uncle Kiwi's.. eating way too much, hootin' and a hollerin'. It was great. Our front room is now littered with tons of presents (odd .. since we all said we weren't going to exchange gifts this year).

I will share pictures from Christmas Eve Day.. it was postcard perfect:


It was, like, 7 degrees.. I wasn't stepping out further than the open doors to take pictures..

Rusty and Maria were on high alert.. undoubtedly anticipating the arrival of St Nick (this had nothing to do with the elk, bunnies and squirrels running about, I swear!):

I personally didn't snap any pictures Christmas Day. My little digie never made it out of my purse.. weird!

I hope everyone is enjoying a wonderful holiday weekend!!

Do You Know? Listen..

Said the shepard boy to the mighty king
Do you know what I know
In your palace wall mighty king
Do you know what I know
A child, a child
Shivers in the cold
Let us bring him silver and gold
Let us bring him silver and gold

Said the king to the people everywhere
Listen to what I say
Pray for peace people everywhere
Listen to what I say
The child, the child
Sleeping in the night
He will bring us goodness and light
He will bring us goodness and light

The child, the child
Sleeping in the night
He will bring us goodness and light

Do You Hear?

Said the little lamb to the shepard boy
Do you hear what I hear
Ringing through the sky shepard boy
Do you hear what I hear
A song, a song
High above the tree
With a voice as big as the sea
With a voice as big as the sea

Do You See?

Said the night wind to the little lamb
Do you see what I see
Way up in the sky little lamb
Do you see what I see
A star, a star
Dancing in the night
With a tail as big as a kite
With a tail as big as a kite

It's A Sign ~ Subtlety Part 2

In my emailbox this morning ----> THERE'S STILL TIME!! <----

(.. just sayin'...)