Early last week I got a call from one of our workers. Being "on hiatus" from fostering until February (unless a huge emergency comes up) I honestly thought she was calling to wish us a Merry Christmas.. that's just how sweet she is.
I quickly realized it wasn't a social call.
She started by saying she was completely aware that the little girl they were calling us on was not a match. That being said, she had seen Jack and Jill blossom in our care and wanted us to be contacted just the same. Before handing the phone off to another worker, she gave this bit of advice, "You all need to make this decision with your heads and not your hearts..."
Holding breath..
The story told was beyond heart wrenching and in no time I was in tears. Sobbing, actually. What the poor little angel had been through was mind numbing. At 10 years old, no less. I listened carefully, took notes like mad and tried to remember to ask all the pertinent questions.
Talk about being caught off guard.
I called DH wearing my Super Hero Cape just knowing we could swoop in and save the day. I read back what I could (trying to decipher the crazy-hurried chicken scratch). Silence. And more silence. He was clearly unsure. Time was of the essence and I gave him 10 (whole) minutes to decide if we wanted to move forward with a presentation.
In the meantime I called Nantie. Remember, the three of us need to be on board.. this is a family affair. She was heart broken but unsure, as well.
By the time I called DH back he had decided it was not a good match. Much like
The Call we got on the sisters in August of 2008, once again he was the voice of reason. Unfortunately, there are so many layers of issues in this case we are just not equipped to handle them all. Going into a situation like this ill-prepared is a recipe for disaster.
Dismayed, I packed my cape and called the workers back. We were one of several families contacted but I still felt great sadness. Thinking with your head just plain stinks sometimes.
I wanted to remind ya'll that this is a really tough time of year for the kiddos (and their families) in the system. Drinking and drug use typically spikes over the holidays. While we're all enjoying family and friends and creating new wonderful memories, bear in mind there is sadness and loss in our own backyards. Please keep them all in your prayers for peace, safety and comfort.
And don't forget to count your blessings.
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Meet Little Buddy (6 yrs) and adorable little sister Sweet Pea (22 months old). At this point we don't know if they will be with us a day, a week, a year or a lifetime. What we do know is they are darling and brave. Very very brave.
Duane, ReRun and Rog came by to give an update on...you guessed it: 
Back in August when we got called on the sisters, we made the heart wrenching decision to decline. There was a huge twist in the case and our gut reaction was it was more than we could handle. I must say, being completely honest with yourself (and mate) downright stinks. It was at that time we dug deep and came to the realization that going from zero to two kids all at once was biting off more than we could chew. We decided to change our file from 2 children to 1 child. We would keep our certification current and adopt again a few years down the line. Since then the phone has been silent.
During Nantie's last home study visit, "D" asked if we had gotten any calls for emergency placements. For the record, we have not (trust me, ya'll will know). Come to find out, "D" had heard they were going to call us on a set of 3 month old twin girls both with broken bones. If that isn't hearbreaking I don't know what is. They were working hard to place the girls with family and were obviously successful.
We got a call from "E" (our wonderful new placement worker) on Friday and it sounds like one of the other families may need respite care over the holidays for two little girls (an 18 month old and 3 year old). Basically, it's baby sitting for another foster family. We are required to do respite at least three times and did it once back in August. It is a great experience for newbies like us and relieves foster parents .. so everyone wins. I told "E" we're home all through Christmas but leaving for a long weekend of snowmobiling on New Years Day.
And the winners of the $25 gift cards to Target are....
At the beginning of The Big Meeting last week I was told not to worry if we decided it wasn't going to work. They reassured me we wouldn't be put on some horrible Black List out there somewhere. That actually alleviated a bit of the pressure and helped me relax. We were all on the same page and wanted what was best for all.
