I Love You But Don't Come Near Me..

DH, Nantie and I all have very different rolls in our household. Nantie spends the most time with the children, runs them to various appointments and is firm but very loving. She is like a grandmother and they love her from the tops of their heads to the tips of their toes.

The kids never had much of a father figure to speak of and they adore DH. He's like their personal jungle gym/teddy bear. Their screeches of delight when he comes home are at a pitch that only dogs can hear. When he speaks, they listen. When he tickles them they about pee their pants. DH rocks.

Then there's me. I am the rule maker and the not-so-fun-one. Don't get me wrong, we giggle and play but I'm fairly certain I'm seen as The Warden. I'm the mother figure but they already have a mom and have an allegiance to her. It's like almost cheating on her, right? Can you imagine trying to process such huge emotions at only 4 1/2 years old?!

Little Jill and I have really started to form a cool bond. She is very snuggly and seems to handle her growing love for me with ease. Jack, on the other hand, struggles with it. A LOT. Many times he'll ask me to move away (like last night when he was brushing his teeth) or demand DH or Nantie help dress him (rather than me).

My presence just plain ticks him off sometimes.

There are times when he names everyone (including the dogs) and tells me he loves them but not me. I know where it's coming from (his painful turmoil from within) but to say it doesn't hurt to hear would be a fib. On the flip side, if he wakes crying from a nightmare he comes to me for comfort. I'm not completely wicked.

I tell him time and again he can love or not love whomever he wishes. I choose to love him no matter what and I am not going anywhere.

Then I slip him an Oreo cookie for good measure.

;o)

Perfect Moment Monday

Remember when this was the only way to travel? Ya, me neither .. but their squeals of laughter were what made this a Perfect Moment.

DH should have thighs of steel any day now..

I Capture
Perfect Moments.

Starting Them Young..

Auntie Bren and Kadi will be happy to hear the kids are already hooked on Starbucks.

Seriously.

The Saturday before Easter I had to work. That morning DH, Auntie MooMoo, Uncle Kiwi, Jack and Jill piled into the car and headed over to a local high school where a church was putting on an egg hunt. It was freezing cold, starting to drizzle and the line to get in was literally was 3 miles long (or so the story goes). They put the kibosh on attending the hunt and went over to a park instead. After playing for some time, all were chilled to the bone and Auntie MooMoo had a great idea:

STARBUCKS!

Of course, the kiddos didn't have coffee.. they got hot chocolate, a cookie the size of Jack's head and a scrumdilliumptious pastry. They call it "The Coffee Store" and are still talking about how good it smells inside. They want to know when we're going back. For the record, if they visit two more times they will officially have been to Starbucks one more than I have.

So wrong.

Personally, I would've taken them to 7-11 but that's just me. NOW I have to find a second job to afford their addiction and learn the language so I can go in and order with confidence. I wonder if Rosetta Stone has software for just such a dilemma..

Stay Tuned ..

Beg Your Pardon?

Me CASA En My Casa

Huh?

It's yet another day of leaving work early (THANK THE GOOD LORD I have awesome bosses!) as one more worker gets thrown into the mix... the kids' CASA (Court Appointed Special Advocate) is coming to the house for a visit. She's a volunteer that is the G.A.L's (Guardian Ad Litem--basically, the childrens' lawyer) eyes and ears. From the National Casa web site:

CASA volunteers are appointed by judges to watch over and advocate for abused and neglected children, to make sure they don’t get lost in the overburdened legal and social service system or languish in an inappropriate group or foster home. They stay with each case until it is closed, and the child is placed in a safe, permanent home. For many abused children, their CASA volunteer will be the one constant adult presence—the one adult who cares only for them.

Trying to keep all the workers (and their functions) straight is a feat in and of itself. I need to start using flash cards.

Yes, there will be a quiz later..

Entrecard Schmantrecard

Would someone PLEASE explain to me what the HECK is going on with Entrecard??! Before I can reject all the paid ads (which I always do) they still creep onto my little blog. WHAT THE??! Any suggestions to stopping this? It's totally peeving me off..

For all of you Ecarders that love a sale, it's only 4 credits to advertise here.. I'm just sayin'..

Happy Earth Day..

Happy Earth Day to you ... Happy Earth Day to you.. Happy Earth Day dear... EEAARRRTTHH.. Happy Earth Day To You!

And Many Mooore!

Perfect Moment Monday

I Capture
Perfect Moments.

One more discovery along this journey: Ensie shoes are downright darling (and always make me smile).

Not Covered in Training..

Last night when the twins were tucked in bed and I was giving final kisses ("gettin' my sugah" as Auntie MooMoo calls it), out of the blue Jill says, "We love you, Nantie, DH .. everyone... and we don't want to leave."

*Blink*

How I kept my composure is totally beyond me. Must of been the shock.

What I WANTED to say: Oh baby, we love you both beyond words and don't worry, you're not going anywhere.

What I MANAGED to say: Darling, we love you both, too... (tears welling). The only thing you have to worry about is which movie we pick out to watch tomorrow and what games we'll play outside.

She smiled. Sweet relief.

Jill went on to tell me she knows they have to leave when "The People" tell them to but they really don't want to. I have no idea where that came from as we never speak of those things. Undoubtedly their mom talks about them returning home during visits.

Little Jill is our old soul and never ceases to amaze us. She gets it. Sweet Jack understands to a certain degree, we just don't think he can verbalize it as well.

Our little conversation was a dagger in my heart.

Calling All Mommies!!

Kadi at



is looking for team members to assist with her blog!! Are you a mommy that loves to write??? Give her a holler now!

Who Da Thunk...

Looking back on the day we got "The Kinda Call" from the County about the twins, I smile. We were supposed to be down for only one child but our status had not been changed (five months earlier). We were still on the proverbial board for two children and honestly, DH was pretty peeved. Talk about not being listened to, right? Jack and Jill's placement with us was initially on an emergency basis as we were not sure we could handle them.

One of DH's concern was bonding with a little boy. A little girl would surely wrap him around her finger in no time.. but a boy? We were totally treading in unknown waters..

Unbeknownst to us the evening we met the kids at their relatives home (the night before they moved in) was like looking into a crystal ball. Jack was all over DH like white on rice. We had no doubt that of the two kiddos, he got the least amount of attention. And he craved it. Up until that point, there had been no Daddy figure to speak of.

Fast forward three months to the day of The Call...

The little boy that may not bond with DH is his little shadow. A 3 foot helper, he wants his hair combed like DH, drinks his milk to grow big like DH and just this week started calling him Daddy.

Insert melting heart here.

The change never being made to our status was not a fluke nor an accident. Jack and Jill were meant to be here.. be it for 10 months or a lifetime. We giggled last night over our previous concerns and the loss of sleep because of them.

Silly newbies.

A Quickie Update...

Easter weekend rocked in our little village. Saturday night as the kids were fast asleep, DH put out the eggs for the hunt..

Auntie MooMoo and I had worked on baskets and part of the haul looked like this..
Sunday morning started at 5:45am when Jack and Jill awoke to find 2 plastic eggs on their bedside table. The Easter Bunny HAD COME! Of course they had to come into our room and alert us of the nocturnal visitation. Although instructed to go back to bed and NOT into Nantie's room to tell her the Big News they had other plans. She, too, was made aware the Easter Bunny was COOL.

I was able to hold them at bay until 7am. Pretty darn good if I do say so myself. Visions of my parents taking FOR-EV-ER to get up on a holiday danced in my head. Sweet justice.

In other news... The Big Meeting last week went fine. I made an appearance to Play Nice but, in the end, left pretty peeved. One of the surprises in this journey is how compassionate DH is and how hard I have to work at it.

Ecostore USA Winner!!!!

CONGRATULATIONS Carolyn G!!! You are the winner of our $25 gift certificate to ecostore USA!!!

Please drop me a line at myfullcircle@gmail.com with your info and we'll get that certificate out to you!!

Inhale..

Jack and Jill have been here for over 2 1/2 months now and one thing is for certain .. no two nights are ever the same. Although typically on their best behaviour and little darlings there are things that set them off. Total triggers (yes, they're being documented). Last week, for example, we had one humongous melt down (Jack, not me). It was bad. It was a rage that we likend to a purging but (thanks to our fantastic training by the county and follow up support) I recognized it for what it was and remained calm.

A feat in and of itself.

I was also very aware I was living a Super Nanny episode. No joke. For the record I would much rather sit and watch the show than lug a kicking and screeching 35 pounder onto a naughty chair for over an hour. Oh yeah, I wasn't too fond of all the toys and folded laundry thrown at me, either. Two things I learned that night: 1) Jo Jo's methods are spot on and 2) I am so out of shape it's not even funny.

Remember that big meeting I was dreading a couple weeks back? The one I hoped and prayed would get cancelled and it did due to a blizzard? It got rescheduled.. to tomorrow. DH cannot make it and I'm on my own. Prayers please!!

Did I mention my dad had a pacemaker implanted earlier this week (he's in a nursing home out of state)? I got a call tonight as we were wrapping up our soiree with three social workers that came a-callin' (a planned meeting) that he has been moving his arm around (just like he wasn't supposed to) and pulled a wire. He goes back in for surgery tomorrow.

Oy.

It has been an exhausting week (and we're only half way through). The good news is we're keeping our noses above water level (thanks to Nantie!) and hey, I guess we can't complain about is being bored, right?

Exhale..

Ecostore USA Review & Giveaway!

I have to admit, we are far from being the crunchy granola types. We are, however, working on being green and were really excited when I was approached by ecostore USA to review some products. Founded in New Zealand over 15 years ago (a country close to our hearts as it's Uncle Kiwi's homeland) ecostore NZ is now a well known brand in over 600 retail outlets throughout the country. They export to Australia and the United Kingdom, as well.



Ecostore USA offers over 100 products, each one meeting the most stringent environmental and sustainability standards. The guiding principle of every formulation is and will always be that the end product must not only be good for the user, but good for the planet.

Oh, and did I mention easy on the pocketbook??


The Reviewed Products:

Dishwash Liquid:

Gentle on your skin yet effective on your dishware the Ecostore USA Dish Liquid has great grease cutting power and leaves a light, fresh fragrance. Free of any synthetic chemicals, your family and the planet will appreciate it! (17 fluid ounces)
Ingredients
Palm and coconut based ionic, non-ionic and anionic surfactants
Mineral hydroxide
Natural citrus oil

With 5 of us now in the house we are constantly doing dishes. I was very impressed with the cleaning power, the light fragrance AND that a little bit goes a long way. Love that!

Laundry Liquid:
Ecostore USA uses 100% Certified Organic Eucalyptus oil and plant-based ingredients, making it ideal for washing your children’s clothing. Conventional laundry liquids often leave chemical residue on bedding, clothes and even skin. This product is a wonderful, healthy alternative. (33.8 fluid ounces)
Ingredients
Palm and Coconut based non-ionic and anionic surfactants
Fatty acid derivative
Mineral hydroxide
Certified organic Eucalyptus oil

Another constant in our little village is laundry... it's never ending. Although always trying to budget properly and save where I can, I am very particular about laundry soap. From how clean the clothes actually come out to how they smell. It's something I don't scrimp on. Nantie is also sensitive and can get nasty headaches from certain fragrances. I am pleased to report we both were impressed. I love the fresh, light smell and the clothes were perfectly laundered. Once again, a little went a long way. Most excellent!

Pure Oxygen Whitener:
The Pure Oxygen Whitener contains oil of citrus and Coconut and other plant-based ingredients. Ecomommas will love the way this product brightens and cleans baby’s clothes and does not contain any harsh chemicals that could irritate delicate skin.(35.3 ounce size)
Ingredients
Carbonates (simple mineral salts)
Sodium percarbonate (oxygen producing whitener)
Sodium bicarbonate (baking soda)
Citrates (from citrus)
Highly biodegradable surfactant
Natural citrus oil

No lie.. our whites are whiter (minus eye watering bleach smells) and our colors seemed brighter. Love it!

Vanilla Soap:

Don't be shy about using the Vanilla Soap all over your body. Ecostore created their soaps with vegetable oils and natural essential oils that are great for daily use. (2.9 ounces)
Ingredients
Sodium Palmate (palm oil)
Sodium Cocoate (coconut oil)
Sodium chloride (salt)
Vegetable Glycerine
Tetra Sodium Etidronate and Tetra Sodium EDTA (antioxidants used to preserve the stability of vegetable oils in soap base. Derived from vinegar. Safe for skin).

I must confess, I didn't actually use this soap for several days. I would just open the box and smell it. Oh my goodness, it smells sooo good. I finally put it out for all to use and it's silky smooth. It's schmancy enough to be put in the guest bathroom but will also be used in the shower. By me. And only me. I claim that as a perk.

I was totally impressed with all of the products reviewed and will continue to be a customer of ecostore USA!!

NOW FOR THE GIVEAWAY!!!!

Surf over to ecostore USA and check out all their products. Come back and comment on what you would like to try and why. Next Sunday (April 12th) an entry will be chosen at random for a $25 gift certificate to ecostore USA!

But wait there's more.. Earn extra entries! Leave a comment when you do the following:
*Add my button to your blog and let me know. (5 entries)
*Follow my blog and let me know who you are. (5 entries)
*If you don't have a blog, that's okay - email your friends about this giveaway and CC me at myfullcircle@gmail.com! (5 entries)
*Stumble this giveaway. (2 entries)

Have fun and GOOD LUCK!

The Prayer Heard Throughout The World ~ Baby Stellan

The blogosphere has been a-buzz over Stellan. Many of us worldwide are praying for this little warrior .. he's battling for his life. What really brings it home is Stellan's Name Gallery. Please make some time to check it out. Let it sink in.. it's humbling and awe inspiring.

If you submit a photo to his gallery, please leave me a link in the comment section.. I would love to see it! Here's Kadi's!!

God Bless Stellan and his family.

Today Stinks.. No Foolin'

I'm no fan of April 1st. 11 years ago today I lost Mama to ovarian cancer and honestly, it still feels like yesterday. Some days her memory makes me smile and on others I cry.

I hope to be half the amazing person she once was.



I love you, Mama and miss you dearly.

Mystery Solved

(Thank you for my beautiful gift, Bren.. OF COURSE it came from my Magnet Girl!! DUUHH!!)