Tuesday, May 12, 2009

"Drama Free.. That's The Life For Me.."

That was my mantra when I gave my ex the boot for the very last time. For you newer readers ... prior to meeting, both DH and I had been in relationships with addicts (we were trying to "save" them and found out the hard way, you can't). After 6 years of my ex's insane life, I finally put my foot down. I was exhausted, nearly broke and had given him his last second chance (for the hundred thousandth time). Enough was enough.

Months later when the divorce was final and the shock and awe of being single in my 30's finally wore off, I dipped my toe into the dating pool again. What fun (not). Older and wiser, this time I was going into it with a list in my head of what I would and wouldn't put up with. Right up there in the Top 5 was NO DRAMA.

Realistically, by a certain age we all come to the table with baggage. Some worse than others. I myself had at least a clutch (er, and a duffel bag, 2 steamer chests and a small carry on). No one is perfect but we can still shoot for the stars, right? All I really wanted was a quiet happily ever after.

Fast forward 8 years..

If the phone rings at midnight, it's an emergency. A wild Saturday night is staying up for the 2nd song played by the band on SNL. My husband comes home after work every night. Checkbooks no longer disappear. Drama Free..

Until now..

Now we're foster parents and once again, livin' on the edge. You never know what is going to happen from one day to the next. From the kids to the case itself.. don't even try to guess what's around the next bend because you never will. Crazy stress over reporting scratches and bruises. Sleepless nights before meetings. Trying to parent and flying by the seat of our pants on occasion. Never a dull moment.

Doing this is not for the faint of heart. On top of dealing with everything being thrown at you, you're also working with the government. SA--WEET! I thank God our workers DO care and DO go to bat for the kids. I shudder at the thought of having slacker workers. It should be against the law.

This week was better than the last and we relish our small victories while we have them.

Tonight is Drama Free. I'll happily take that, thankyouverymuch.



Nichole said...

Amen sister! I try to cut drama out of my life, but I do know respire foster care will be a roller coaster ride. At least when you make a final adoption you will have more control of the dramameter.

As far as personal relationships go I think people can go their whole life without realizing that they are never going to FIX anyone. No addict is ever going to change for a woman. I've tried! Many times! I'm glad you took the courage to change that pattern too :)

Sheri said...

There is a special place in heaven for foster parents.

I'm all for no drama. Enjoy your evening!


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