What We Are and Are Not..

We're not: Doe-eyed going into this thinking we're going to find a "perfect child".. is there really such a thing, anyway? They end up in the system because of bad circumstances.. I've had nightmares over just a few of the things I've read some of these poor kiddos go through. An eye opener doesn't even come close to describing the experience thus far and we're not even in the thick of things yet.

We are: Aware that the county is not an adoption agency. They're the first to say it and remind us constantly that their hope is always reunification. We're Plan B.

We're not: Heroes by any sense of the word... especially in the eyes of the children. They will want to be home and not here.. that is one of the many things I'm trying to teach myself now.

We are: Aware that we're the bottom of the totem pole and will have no say. Again, another lesson I'm trying to get through my thick skull.

We're not: Ever going to be 100% prepared when we get "the call". I've read wonderful books trying to equip myself but you can't learn everything in 6 months. Well, I can't anyway. I think once I know what the issues are I can focus on learning how to cope with those specific ones.

We are: willing to open our home and hearts in the hopes of having a family of our own. Along they way I know our hearts will most likely be ripped out, we'll be treated like 2nd class citizens, we'll get a first hand look at a system that is dysfunctional but maybe.. just maybe we'll make a difference in a little life or two.. or.. ?

This coming Wednesday we go up for review and The Board (whomever they are) will vote on our certification. Then it's a matter of waiting .. Did I mention how much I dislike waiting?? From what I've read from foster parents and parents that have adopted, I had better get used to it.. Blah.