The Storm Before The Calm...

I've got to be honest, life in our humble abode is tumultuous at best. Our little blonde haired blue eyed pixie is on a massive emotional roller coaster (the likes we've never seen before). JuneBug has been running Nantie absolutely ragged every single day. Not only do we have a 2 1/2 year old (they're wild enough as it is) but add trauma to the mix and DNA that undoubtedly has not just anger but all-out fury issues and it's a recipe for some disastrous days. Then there's the whole immobility thing. Oh.. ya..THAT..

Although we don't talk about it, we're fairly certain she is sensing something is going on (the pending move) and is none too happy about it. On top of all this she has to try to deal with the visits (which are either okay or downright horrible) and how on earth does she even start to process all that stuff??!

I'll tell you: Inconsolable Rage.

Poor Nantie is on the front lines all day long and let me tell ya, it's no walk in the park. She is a saint. She'll be the first to say she isn't but I beg to differ. Please keep our dearest Nantie and JuneBug in your prayers for peace and comfort.

Word on the street is big changes are on the horizon and we may be spinning with her next move in a couple weeks. This is going to be the crazy before she can settle.. another stressful situation to endure before she can finally (FINALLY) be home for good. Poor sweet, innocent baby. She doesn't deserve any of this and it is heart breaking to witness.

Adoption Angles ~ REPLAY!!

Oh my goodness, what a great show! Kelsey has such a beautiful story and her book is straight from the heart. We were chatting up a storm, hootin' and a-hollerin' last night. Didja miss it? Well, grab your fav bevvie, sit back and enjoy!! When she first came on we had some volume issues, so crank up the speakers. It does, eventually, self correct so HANG IN!



Kels, thank you SOOO much for coming on, sharing your journey and giving away the autographed book (I love mine)! As I said in my email, I consider myself blessed to call you my friend!

MomTV's Adoption Angles ~ My Totally Rad Guest (& Giveaways!)

So, who is my awesome guest on Adoption Angles tonight? Why, it's none other than the lovely Kelsey Stewart, that's who!

She is a mother of 5 children, three of which she placed for adoption. She now has two boys she is raising with her husband. Kelsey is the author of a beautiful children's book The Best For You that explains adoption from a birth mothers perspective (something that is ironically missing in the adoption world even today). She has written articles for The Open Adoption Examiner and Tapestry Books, the latter so appreciated her work they created an eBooklet available on their web site. The past 20 years she has had a very open relationship with her adopted children and positively advocates for adoption (especially the birth mother's point of view).

Her mission? To use her voice and experiences to change the way people think about all birth parents.

You can also find Kelsey at:
Her Blog: The Birth Mother Voice
Her Facebook Fan Page
And Twitter: @bestforyoubook

Tonight's show will undoubtedly be enlightening and inspiring .. but guess what? We've also got something really special in store for our wonderful viewers! Kelsey will be giving away an autographed copy of her book:

AND ...

I'll be giving away a $20 gift card to Puma Kids!! Two viewers will be randomly chosen at the end of our broadcast so please make sure you let us know you're there!!

How do you log in??? Piece of cake..

CLICK HERE ~~~>

It's super dooper easy to join the live text chat fun... just click on: "Click Here To Enter Chat" and either use your member log in OR type in a chat name and VIOLA.. you're in like FLYNN! We loooove your questions and comments!

So, write yourself a sticky note and pop it on your forehead. 9PM EST tonight.. be there!

Perfect Moment Monday

One- Blind 14 year old Min Pin + One- 2 1/2 year old spitfire = Besties

I Capture
Perfect Moments.

Two Weeks Down ~ Two To Go...

And that dang cast gets removed.. we hope! If JuneBug's recovery is on track she will stroll out of the doctor's office sporting a walking cast.

Please Lord Please.

All things considered, she is doing really well. Once into everything, she is now immobile and having to adjust to chilaxing. She can focus longer on a single activity and actually has a few movies of choice that she can almost watch all the way through. She still loves her books and snuggling on the couch with her Nana (Nantie) is another fav past time.


I have spoken with the RFT (our worker) and voiced my concern over not having a transition week. It is her job to schedule them and was clearly NOT happy the ongoing worker wasn't considering one. She said something along the lines of, "Oh, the bio family will come out for a week and they WILL have a proper transition.."

Booyah!

Here's my beef: JuneBug was comfortable around the family but honestly didn't know them from Adam. We have no doubt they adore her and I'm sure she sensed the loving vibes. That being said, my gut says Bug did okay with them because we were present and it was "safe". If she recognized them off the bat I would have no problem with them picking her up, hopping on a plane and jetting home once the paperwork is complete. But she didn't and I strongly feel she needs a transition with them just like she had with us.

No ifs, ands or buts about it.

SO, once again I have stirred the pot and will probably tick off the workers that don't feel a week of bonding prior to leaving is necessary. Oh, and the family, too. Can ya'll tell I'm really broken up about all that??

AS IF!

Missed Adoption Angles Last Night???

Well, it's your lucky day!



Thank you, Erica, for sharing your inspiring story!! I have no doubt that we'll be seeing you on the national scene and PFM will grow beyond your wildest dreams!!

Giveaway Tonight On MomTV's Adoption Angles!

Just an FYI for all my giveaway lovin' friends.. during tonight's live broadcast of MomTV's Adoption Angles, I'll be giving away a $20 gift card to Puma Kids!! You'll be randomly chosen so let me know you're there with a cool chat name!!

MomTV's Adoption Angles ~ We're Baaaccck!

You know, I really missed doing the show last week and so totally psyched to be back.. and with yet another amazing guest, no less! I'm thrilled to announce the beautiful Erica from Parenthood For Me will be joining us!!


Hers is a journey of unsuccessful infertility treatments that eventually led to starting a family via adoption. She is the Founder and President of the non-profit Parenthood For Me, Inc with a mission to provide emotional support, educational tools, and financial support to those adopting or pursuing Assisted Reproductive Technology (ART) to try and conceive. We hope to ease some of the burden bestowed on people who desperately want to be parents.

In her words, "Having a family is fundamental to the human experience. It should not come down to the size of your bank account..."

CAN I GET AN AMEN??!!??

CLICK HERE ~~~>

Let me tell ya, it's crazy easy to join the live text chat fun... just click on: "Click Here To Enter Chat" and either use your member log in OR type in a chat name and VIOLA.. you're in like FLYNN! We loooove your questions and comments!

By the by, you can also find Erica on her Facebook Fan Page, her blog:
and on Twitter @parenthoodforme..

We're live from New York and Colorado tonight at 9PM EST (that's 6PM for all my west coast besties!!)... JOIN US!!!!

Dear Lord...

Please watch over little JuneBug tonight. Please fill her dreams with giggles and fun (with no uncomfortable casts in sight). Chocolate and ponies would be a bonus. Please let her sleep through the night without restlessness or pain and keep the bad memories away. Please protect her and bless her all her days.

Lord, please watch over us grown ups. Please give us patience in the midst of utter chaos, compassion because there are things we'll never understand and remind us to enjoy the sweet sweet moments before they fly away forever. Forgive us for not always getting it right the first time.. we're human and so imperfect.

And thank you for today.

Amen.

Perfect Moment Monday

Baby's first elk sighting.

I Capture
Perfect Moments.

Mama's New Digs...

So, remember last week when I briefly mentioned JuneBug couldn't walk for the next 4 (FOUR) weeks? Well.. here's the rest of the story..

We were originally told she would be able to bear weight on her cast a week or so after surgery. We thought, "Holy cow, how are we going to keep her down THAT long?" Sigh. The surgeon had not seen JuneBug since their first visit in January and apparently back then she was walking on the side of her foot. In the months since it has self-corrected and the surgery was going to be less evasive (which meant less time under anesthesia, less pain and she didn't have to spend the night at the hospital.. Hooray!). The new game plan? They were going to move the tendon from one side of the foot to the other to pull it into the correct position. That's it. It's an itsy bitsy little thing and the slightest bit of pressure can blow it out.

Fast forward to post-op low down with nurse..

So, Nantie and I are getting the skinny on the do's and don'ts before discharge. That is when we were told she couldn't walk for a month. Mind you, by that point we had been going like gangbusters for nearly 12 hours and it had been a beyond stressful day on many levels (even had some MamaDrama thrown in for good measure).

We.Were.Baked.

Ya, our heads about exploded. The kicker was when I picked myself up off the floor (.. er, I mean the information started to sink in) and asked the nurse for some advice on keeping our toddler occupied (ie: confined) her response? She shrugged her shoulders and wished us luck.

Seriously.

One of our big concerns out of the shoot was her bedroom. Our old routine was we left her bedroom door open with a baby gate up for security and a monitor so we could hear her throughout the house. Presurgery, after she awoke and was done playing with books and toys she would stand at the gate and holler, "I WAKE UP!!!" (very cute, I might add).

Obviously, we needed a Plan B because that wasn't going to fly. This is what we came up with...

Baby Bear is now next to the wall and Mama Bear is beside her. I am able to provide comfort in the middle of the night and be that barrier between her and the rest of the world. Oh, and our 14 year old mostly blind min pin (Miss CoCo) joins us as well. JuneBug has taken great delight in our girls-only slumber parties. We're averaging about 3 hours of sleep at a time..

Once again, I am thanking the Good Lord above for makeup and coffee.

Bottom Line: We're flying by the seat of our pants but hanging in. Lil Bug continues to be an absolute trooper (yes, we have our moments but hello? She has been through the ringer). Poor little thing has even more to deal with on the horizon. The county is waiting on just a couple more bits of paperwork to come through and she'll get the green light to move.

Please keep her in your prayers.

This Is How We Rock..

(and roll) a Friday night..

Just try to keep up..

MomTV's Adoption Angles..

Will not be seen tonight.. as JuneBug so eloquently put it,

"Mommy, you a mess!"

So so true..

I'm thrilled to announce joining me next week on AA is the amazing Erica from Parenthood For Me!! She will be discussing her own adoption journey and amazing organization.. it'll be a blast!!

So, enjoy your Wednesday night ya'll and I'll see you next week!!! :o)

My, What A Difference A Day Makes...

Monday Morning: Packed and ready to hit the road..


Tuesday Morning: Kickin' it on the couch..


Yesterday was huge and exhausting.. and JuneBug was a complete trooper. So much so it brings tears to my eyes. Bio fam was there, so was our worker, CASA and I thank the Good Lord Nantie was there, as well.

Yes, that little bit of pink on her foot is a cast.. one that goes all the way up to her bootie. She has to stay off of it for 4 (FOUR) weeks! We're still not sure how we're going to convince our crazy-active 2 1/2 year old of that. We have her in the stroller in the house and are contemplating a Radio Flyer wagon.

Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated.

Perfect Moment Monday ~ Sunday Edition

I am posting this now because I just don't trust Blogger as some of my "scheduled posts" have failed me in the past.

Holy cow, this is the first time I am doing a PMM without a picture. So, close your eyes and listen.. oh wait.. that won't work..

Dang it.

My PM was the very moment I laid eyes on JuneBug's family as they walked up the drive today. I just had a sense of passing the baton and complete peace about it. JB was excited because we were excited but the love they poured over her was so genuine I wish you all could've been there. Her being with them is meant to be beyond words. She warmed up nicely and yes, there will be bumps because we won't have a full transition.. but she will have her happily ever after. As they say in the Hokey Pokey, "That's what it's all about!" (clap clap). Sorry, I couldn't help myself..

We spent the better part of the day with them and we feel without any hesitation they are phenomenal .

Thank you thank you for all your words of encouragement--once again, you all have lifted us up and we feel and appreciate all the prayers and good vibes. Please keep JuneBug in your prayers tomorrow as she will be in surgery. I will keep you all posted.

Another reminder that God's Plan finally revealed is always way better than you could ever imagine.

And Perfect.

I Capture
Perfect Moments.

Crazayzy ~ Round 1 ...

Later this morning JuneBug's family will arrive from out of state. Rather than swinging by their hotel and checking in, they will be coming straight to our home from the airport. As you can imagine, they're dying to see Little Bug. Our social worker will be coming here, as well.

Yes my friends, it's a Sunday ShinDing County-Style.

Unfortunately, they will be here right as she is supposed to be going down for a nap. If she is still up I hope (for their sake) she's not wearing her Cranky Pants. Then again, they'll get a good taste of what they're in for..

Just sayin'...

As odd as it might sound, I look forward to meeting them. They seem to be awesome people and we've established a nice rapport. My hope is what little time JB gets to spend with them now will somehow help familiarize her with them enough to make her departure from here less traumatic. Doubtful but that's my prayer. Once the final paperwork hits our worker's desk, they will fly back out and off they will go with her. There will be no transition.

Did I mention that could happen in the next couple weeks?

For now it's business as usual.. no hints that massive change is in the air. We're kickin' it watching Charlie & Lola, enjoying bagels and juice .. and watching out for elk and bunnies, of course..


But if you listen closely you can hear bits of my heart starting to break.

Counting Small Blessings...

So, here we are in the quiet of a Saturday morning. Nantie and DH are upstairs asleep and the canines are all snoozing in their various places. It's just me and JuneBug. She awoke in a good mood (rare) and I'm relishing the happy, cuddling moments. Life in our little village has been rough..

To put it nicely.

On top of being 2 1/2 (and all the crazazy that goes with the age), JuneBug experienced some type of trauma in her past. We know little about Bmom (the county doesn't give up much info, of course). What we have been told makes us shiver over what Little Bug may very well of been exposed to. It breaks my heart and makes me furious at the same time.

Bottom Line: Turmoil. And we're taking the brunt of it.

For now, I am basking in the moments of calm and peace this morning. I pray they aren't fleeting. I will soak up the snuggles and silly.. because tomorrow our life gets turned upside down again.

And the real crazayzy begins.

Miss Lori ~ REPLAY!!

I've got to throw out a Big Ole Full Circle/Adoption Angles, "Thank You!!" to the Lovely Miss Lori! She is such an amazing, inspiring, wonderful person and I am honored to of had her on the show.

Missed it? Well, just watching her makes me smile and I've gotta share that wealth, right? (You're welcome!)..



I know I know.. I was all geeked-out (running late and excited about the show) and yes, I caught that I misspoke and called the show, "Full Circle" .. no reminders, please! Just a heads up.. When Miss Lori first came on we had a minor freeze frame issue thing happening but hang in.. it was quickly fixed by my awesome techies working feverishly behind the scenes..

Go on now, grab your favorite bevie.. sit back, relax and enjoy a most excellent show! Thanks again, Miss Lori!!!

Who Is My Awesome Guest on MomTV's Adoption Angles Tonight?!

You may know her from her from MissLori.TV ~ Musings From My MiniVan or Miss Lori's Campus, as a recording artist, educator, a friend on Twitter (@MissLori), a former PBS Kids host or (most importantly) a Mom. But did you know beautiful Miss Lori is adopted (and proudly so)? Well, she is and has a very cool journey to share.

Join us LIVE tonight at 9PM EST (that's 6PM for all my west coast besties!!)... You know we love your questions and comments so make sure to log in and text chat with us..

CLICK HERE ~~~>

It's crazy easy to join the live text chat fun... just click on: "Click Here To Enter Chat" and either use your member log in OR type in a chat name and VIOLA.. you're in like FLYNN!

We look forward to seeing ya'll tonight!!

Hey CO ~You Can Make A Difference In A Child's Life!!

From my email box to you all:

Join CBS4 and The Adoption Exchange
A Day for Wednesday's Child TOMORROW Wednesday, April 7th.

Now is the time to make the difference in a child’s life!

SEE THE FACES
A Day for Wednesday’s Child informs the Colorado community about the hundreds of children who are still waiting for a place to call home. Tune in to see the faces of the children in the Colorado foster care system.

Want a sneak peak?

View Abby's story now. This young girl will touch your heart.

MAKE YOUR DOLLAR GO FURTHER
A very generous donor pledges to match every online donation up to $10,000.
Your donation will help us reach our goal!
If you live in the state of Colorado and make a donation of $250 or more, you are entitled to a 50% Child Care Contribution Credit on your Colorado State Tax Return.
You can help by making a donation and telling your friends and family about this special day.

Now, more than ever, we need your help.
Stand with us in promising these children they have not been forgotten.

Hey All You Coupon Lovin' Mamas (& Papas)!

Love to find great deals? Are you addicted to coupons? I am, too!! That's why I'm head over heels for the new web site A Full Cup!! Coupons at your fingertips, my friends!

Now surf on over and get your savings-on!!

Happy Easter

Jesus said to her, "I am the resurrection and the life. He who believes in me will live, even though he dies; and whoever lives and believes in me will never die. John 11:25-26

A Beautiful Love Song...

I was contacted by Vincent James, a recording artist from the Philadelphia area. In addition to his singing career, he also writes and performs custom love songs through his website LoveSongs.com (usually for weddings, birthdays, anniversaries, etc--the perfect gift for that special occasion, by the way). Several years back he participated in a custom song giveaway with a local radio station. They would pick the winner, he would write the song, do a quick recording that same day and they would play it on the air the next day. Cool, right? What happened next is in his own words:

"I expected the winner would want a song for a wedding, birthday, anniversary or one of the usual situations. To my surprise the winner was a Mother who had recently given up her child for adoption...she wanted a song that she could play for her child someday should she ever meet/see them again. Upon hearing this story I was completely overwhelmed with emotion...went up to the piano and out came a song called "So Many Things" (from heaven above to my hands and voice). I recorded a very quick demo and they played on the air the next day (KROC in Rochester/MN). I felt so strongly about the song that I recorded a full production of it and put it on my nationally released CD "One More Night". To this day I get chills when I sit at the piano and play "So Many Things"...my wife and children and anyone who listens the song is emotionally moved when they hear it."

Please take a moment and listen.. TISSUE ALERT!

"So Many Things"
So many things that I wanna say
If by chance we meet again some day
I was alone and scared
Feeling trapped with no out
I hope you'll understand
I'll always love you...

So many things I wish I could do
Find a way to make it all up to you
I was alone and scared
Feeling trapped with no out
I hope you'll some day know
I wanted just the best for you...

As time goes by I think of you each day and night
My heart, my love my soul watching over you
There's nothing I can do
Pray each night your dreams come true..
Ooooooooooooooooooo...

So many things that I'm gonna lose
The hardest thing I ever had to do was choose
Cause you were the only one
Who ever was this close to me
I hope some day you'll know
I'll always love you

So many things that I wanna say...
Copyright Vincent James

Vincent, as an adoptee myself, your beautiful song brings me to tears. I have no doubt it was inspired from Heaven above. Thank you so very much for allowing me to share it with my wonderful readers and use it on Adoption Angles!

Please go over to Vincent's web site and let him know how awesome you think he is!!

One Blog ~ One Tree

I was contacted by a group working on an initiative called "Make It Green!". Their goal is to contribute in reducing the carbon footprint by raising awareness of the severe environmental damage caused by carbon emissions.. and the Internet is one of the culprits! Did you know a blog with 15,000 visits a month has a yearly carbon dioxide emissions of 8lb?!

ME NEITHER!



So how exactly do they intend neutralize my blog's carbon footprint? They are planting trees (in cooperation with the Arbor Day Foundation) in Plumas National Forest in Northern California, that's how. Thousands of wildfires burned down many national forests over the past ten years and 88.000 acres of Plumas' were destroyed by two fires in 2007. To help replanting they need the support of bloggers all over the world. For every participating blog they will plant a tree.

One blog - one tree.. how cool is that??

To find out how you and your blog can participate please visit:
How To Participate

Go on, grab your granola bar and go green with me, m'kay?

Adoption Angles Replay ~ A Tribute To Mama

A big thank you to everyone who was able to tune in to last night's show! It was really wonderful (and therapeutic) to get to pay tribute to Mama and share our adoption story with you all.




Missed it? Well, it's your lucky day (and yes, I agree.. I have a face for blogging)...



Mama,

I can hardly believe you have been gone 12 years. I miss you dearly and hope in some way I have made you proud. I strive to do so..

Love,
Your Seesa